and also a few fun pics from the fleshie retreat fest '99. cause, well, everybody likes to see pictures...

let me introduce you to some friends: in the left corner heather and wes in brazil, right corner monica from peru, and above her smiling face the chronics in romania, me, and in the hat my fellow kolkatian, kristin.

the power five: WmF's servant team coordinators...the proverbial mother hens

somebody caught us in mid laugh

this is calvin-heading to nepal and the india gals.

sarah-who completes our kolkata pyramid, calvin and jesse who will be bringing much needed testosterone to the south asia region...and yes, me again.

oh glorious softening.

so, how about a little poetry journal action compliments of 10 days of contemplation Word Made Flesh retreat style. yes? ok...here goes, letters to myself, thoughts from afar.

what do you want.

from your life.

from your words. thoughts. action.

what are you afraid to find.

to hear. dicover?

why is music always on.

noise unending.

the desire always fed.

eyes turned away.

to cover what you really think? to distract

from what you might feel.

where is enjoyment of life

when you fill it with production

when you react to the affections

or lacks there of

distracted by the words of others

and the appearance you up keep

contemplate what suffering shows

you.

about yourself.

and wonder at the fact that unconditional love

means

you're not a product to be bought and sold.

you're not whole

and you want to live and love from a

place of incompleteness.

but god is quietly peeling back the layers

and calling for return.

to love from a center that never runs dry.

oh glorious softening.

oh wondering Savior.

amen.

contemplative logistics...

i'm still in omaha at the moment well, actually the booming metropolis of nebraska city...and fully enjoying my time with the rest of my word made flesh community. we're going through a book about contemplation and the human condition and i wish i could just post every talk, thought, and worship experience here on this page to share with everyone and their mom. its been, well, contemplative...and amazing. i have been writing many things i'll hope to post once i arrive back to indiana and have more time to compile things.
but just for logistic's sake, i wanted to write and say that i'll be back in the crossroads again on the 23rd for one more week of the heartland, if you any of you want to be on contact, talk, or buy sari blankets while i'm around, please feel free to let me know.
and you can expect some contemplative treasures to follow behind me soon.
much love from the prairie.

independance, a day for destruction...

have i mentioned that i love my little bro.

we're currently trying to decide what we can blow up with fireworks today in honor of our nations independance. we'll see what happens. in india for certain holidays they set fireworks off the top of their buildings, maybe we'll start a new tradition here in sharpsville. i'm sure its not against fire code...
or maybe we'll just eat huge cheeseburgers and call it a day.
more depth later. for now, i'm going to play frisbee.

home again home again jigity jig.

i can't say it feels strange to be home. really, i can't say it even feels like i ever left. i've been reflecting on the hats i wear as i slip in and out of environments, change my hat, and keep on moving. streets of kolkata, state road 26, alleys of sonagachi, porch swing in my back yard, coffee shops, riding rickshaws, and motorcyles...
i feel like i've shut the faucet of emotion off, turned it tight to keep out any feelings i might have about being home...america and kolkata.
however, i have had some of the best nights' sleep ever, and when i wake up in the morning i hear birds, chirpy happy song filled birds...not barreling diesel trucks, or the hideous squak of our nemesis...the crows...just quiet peaceful still...and chirpy birdy songs.
being with friends and family is like water to my soul and homemade meals (all including some form of beef!) is the greatest treat in the world...along with plentiful diet cokes and iced tea!

at the airport in london it hit me, as if for the first time, that i didn't stand out any more, and by the time i reached chicago and indianapolis, i realized not one person was staring at me. there's not reason to when i look like everyone else. its an interesting feeling to realize you're not the forienger any more. going from a place where i cannot hide, to a place where everyone looks the same...
i'm mostly just enjoying the clean beautiful indiana air, my quiet runs in the morning along the corn lined country roads, and talks on the couch with my bro.
in the next few weeks i have here, i'm determined not to let my schedule rule. and instead to enjoy the journey and soak in the folks around me.
sometimes i forget what i got, till its gone.
and i refuse to let it happen this time...
more to come.
peace.